Tyra Banks

There really is no other title needed. I am so irritated right now.

I'm sitting in the student lounge in Whittiger (sp?). They installed a new tv in here last week. So now, instead of a semi-quiet area to read or study (or in my case, blog) between classes, now we get to listen to Tyra Banks. Ugh. She is a beautiful model, and was great at it, but who decided that giving her a tv show was a good idea?

She took a couple who was already having trouble, split them up, and sent them on individual dates with other people. Hm. I wonder what is going to happen. Of course, the girl mooned over her boyfriend the entire time, missing him, wishing she hadn't gone on this date. The guy, as expected, had a blast, and almost cheated on his girl. Throw in a steamy scene in a pool and you have a dramatic talk show. Flashbacks to Jerry Springer or Maury?

I guess what annoys me, even more so than the very predictable outcome, is what Tyra supposedly stands for. She set out to create this show to prove that African American women are strong and her race has gotten a bad rap. Now, I agree with her point. But she is destroying that image on this show today. I dunno, it all seems very high schoolish to me.

Question of the Day

What question do you hate being asked? Why?

"How's the wedding planning coming?" or "Are you ready for the big day?"

This question can be compared to a high school senior being asked "Are you ready to graduate?" Everyone who sees The Ring or hears about my upcoming nuptuals asks me this question. Seriously people, do you see the exhausted look in mjy eyes? That should answer your question. I have exactly 38 days (Holy freaking crap!) until Jordan and I finally get to tie the knot. The past 11 months have been crazy hectic. I'm always saying "It will get better when..."

...school is out and I have more free time.

...Jordan gets back from Iraq.

...we find an apartment.

...Jordan gets a job.

...we move into our apartment.

...we get unpacked.

...and on and on and on.

I kept blaming it on all of the outside factors. I've been stressed all summer. However, the closer we get, instead of being less stressed, I'm feeling even more pressure. It's not so much that I mind terribly doing weddingy type things, and my mom has helped out so much that there's a lot that I have not had to do. It's the fact that the closer we get, the more conflict there is. People aren't coming who said they were going to help. My mother in law wants to change the time of the wedding so that she can milk her cows. We should have daisies instead of mums. We have to do this, or we can't do that. Some of the things, I just shrug my shoulders at. I'm not a great event planner, and I haven't been involved in many weddings, so there's a lot I don't know. Mom has several friends who either have had their kids get married or want to be event planners, so it's been a big help. They have been able to tell us what things we need to be worried about when (and to give us the push because Mom and I are both procrastinators.) I don't want anyone to think I'm ungrateful for the help. I'll be the first to admit that I'm not good at this kind of thing. But there are some things that I struggle with that are really frustrating.

A big one that anyone whose been a round me lately has undoubtadly heard too much about is my weight. I've gained way too much since Jordan's been home. At first I didn't realize it, I've never really been one to worry about it. Then, when we went to pick out my veil and headpiece, we tried on a sample of my dress (because Lord knows when mine will be in). Now, this dress is amazing, completely opposite of what I had pictured in my head, but amazing nonetheless. However, we ordered it when I was excersizing every day with Tosha, and I had the metabolism of a 5 year old. I looked amazing, and so this dress looked amazing on me. Now, I've gained a lot of weight, and it is all sitting in my belly. Mom says I look 5 months pregnant (trust me, there's no baby in there). I've been trying so hard to diet, it's not working. We bought bikes so we could start exercising, but rarely do I have time, even if I could FIND the energy. I haven't been to the grocery store in 3 weeks because I've been so busy and tired. And I LOVE to grocery shop. The weight is not coming off like I hoped and my self-confidence is taking a hit because of it. I'm going to have to get a body sleeve, because this dress will show every bump imaginable.

Now, don't get me wrong. I can't wait to marry Jordan. To the point where he's getting tired of me asking if we can elope. I just want to be Mrs. Wall. I'm just tired of everyone telling me how to run my own wedding. This is our day. There are two days that people are going to pay this much attention to us:  our wedding, and our funeral. I won't be here to enjoy the second one, so please let me have this one day where I can have things my way.

And stop asking me if I'm ready. I'm ready to be married, I was ready when he proposed 10 months ago. But a bride is never ready for her wedding until those big doors open the back of the church and everyone turns to look at her. Then you won't have to ask me. You'll know.

Green bath curtains

I am constantly amazed by the creatively green products out there. I dont' think this one would work so well in my home, but I could picture it fitting in awesomely in a college house or a New York style loft. Advertising is becoming more and more beautifully created, and here is a way to bring that art into your own home, while covering up the shower mildew from unexpected guests.

A Word about Libraries

With most libraries, I can walk in, take a quick survey of the layout, and then spend hours perusing the shelves packed with novels, biographies, parperbacks, hardcovers. In a public library, the shelves are stuffed. The organization is clear, set out in the careful Dewey Decimal system we learned in the 4th grade. If you are lookng for something specific, it's so easy to find. If you want to browse, there are thousands of books of all subjects to look through, each in their own sections:  Fiction, Nonfiction, Research, Young Adult, Children's, Large Print Fiction, etc. There are comfy chairs in quiet, musty corners. That's a big point--it's quiet. People who frequent public libraries usually have enough respsect to turn the volume off on their cell phones, and no better than to talk loudly about their latest sexual encounter.

I'm a senior now, and still I have never felt comfortable in Ball State's library. In fact, today was the first time I even checked out a book here. I never know where to find anything--that's the biggest problem. I hate the way Brackin is set up. It makes absolutely no sense. Best Sellers are easy enough to find, but that is such a small collection of fiction. I looked up one book on CardCat, it's call number was PQ8098.1 L54 Z46 2008. What does that even mean? Where do I even start to look for it? Brackin is not a browsing library. I can go and print off my homework, or meet for group projects, but it has never really felt like a library to me. It's so noisy. Even on the 4th floor--the "quiet study area"--there is no escape. Phones ring, girls giggle, and boys, well they are just boys. Those of us who actually are there to study or read are too distracted.

Oh, the brightly covered arm chairs and up-to-date computer systems may be exactly what most students are looking for. Maybe I'm just old school. I've even noticed that my library at home has been seriously updated, even adding a hip-looking coffee shop. But I like the musty, dim-lighted corners. I miss finding something new in shelves that I've looked through hundreds of times. I think on my next day off I'm going to get a card to the Muncie Library.

Photo from here.

Oh my tainted childhood...

I remember, long ago, when ever I would indulge in a chocolate cake, my mom would always come around and give me a spit bath to wash off the extra crumbs. I thought this was the grossest thing ever, and I'm not usually squeamish about germs.

This product his hilarious. Everyone I know went through this experience, now they have a product based on that all purpose cleanser known as Your Mom.

yet another alarm clock

I have this fascination with unique alarm clocks. I think maybe its because I have never really had trouble waking up to an alarm (providing I set one...sort of slept through class this morning). It always amused me when first my sisters, then my roomies, and now Jordan didn't wake up to their alarms. At the Beechwood house there were many grouchy mornings where I almost destroyed Mel's phone because it would go off obnoxiously forEVER! That girl does NOT wake up for anything! Haha, I love you!

Anyway, here's another unique one. You don't have to chase a robot around the room, or put a puzzle together, because seriously, who has the energy for that in the morning? Even I do not. All you have to do is stand on this one. It's a mat that goes off until you put enough weight on it. No superhuman mental capacity needed, you just have to get out of bed. Now, this does not mean you can keep a stack of textbooks on your bed to throw on the mat. That would be cheating.